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I am writing this from a wedding. I will not say whose. But I will say this. The centerpiece on my table costs more than a car, and that is already a problem.

When did this become normal?

I look around and I do not see simcha. I see pressure. Parents walking around like they just refinanced their house for the wedding. The Chassan and Kallah look overwhelmed by the music (don't get me started on the volume) and lights (when did that become a thing???)

Somewhere along the way, we confused Simchas Chassan V'Kallah with showing off. There is beautifying a mitzvah, and then there is lighting money on fire so nobody thinks you are cheap. We crossed that line a long time ago.

People are going into debt for this. Real debt. For flowers that get thrown out. For singers that nobody remembers. For an event that is supposed to be about building a bayis neeman, not winning a competition.

And the craziest part is that everyone knows it is stupid. Nobody actually wants this. Nobody leaves saying, wow, that imported greenery really added alot. They leave saying, how much do you think it costed?

So here is a wild idea. A wedding with normal food that is hot. Music that sounds Jewish. An atmosphere that feels like simcha. A bill that does not follow the parents around for the next ten years.

Make normal normal again. Stop pretending this is holy. It is not hiddur. It is insecurity with a DJ.

If that makes me old fashioned, I am fine with that.